Owning What Happens To You

How can I help you see how you have already set up the conditions for the way your life is evolving right now? Since you were a little child, your family, your experiences and how you internalized everything, has created so much of your world view, of the way you have chosen to understand, to make sense of, yourself and your life. The thing in the road that trips you up is made of your mental models, your decisions, and how you have chosen to see yourself and the world.

I want to suggest a strange idea to you. Imagine that there are two of you: one is the normal you – the you that is the day-awake conscious part of you, and the other runs ahead of you, putting before you experiences, road blocks, pitfalls, difficulties, in order to help you learn more about yourself and the world you live in. This person running ahead is your higher self, a part of yourself you may not be aware exists at all. Your higher self wants you to grow, to mature, to face yourself, to become wise.

Now imagine that both of you together – your normal self and your higher self – are the exacting architects of your current reality. The one builds your reality through the countless decisions made in every moment, and the other designs your experiences with exquisite creative hand, secretly, wiser and cleverer than you.

We hold mental models about ourselves – “I am not worthy, I am not lucky, I suck” – that become self-fulfilling prophesies, not because such mental models are true, but because we bend reality to conform with what we believe. There is no such thing as reality, only perspectives. If I believe the world is a dangerous place, I will be blind to the countless silent ways in which the world is showing me I am safe, I am okay, I am held. Instead, I will create countless ways in which the great “what if” could be evident: “what if I had stepped off the pavement in front of that speeding car a little sooner? I would be toast!”, or, “what if my child fell out of that tree she is climbing, she might hurt herself!”. The “what if”, when fed with my attention, builds fear and trepidation in the soul, which reinforces my belief that the world is a dangerous place.

How we see things – our perspectives – will dictate what decisions we make, which in turn create the current reality we live in. It is possible to trace backwards from predicaments we find ourselves in, the countless small decisions we made along the way which set up the conditions we now find ourselves in.

Knowing all this then, hopefully you can see that you, and you alone, are ultimately responsible for the current reality of your life, and the sooner you understand this, the sooner you can take up the reins of your life and align all of your energies towards creating the kind of current reality you long for.

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